Private Parts, Lindsanity, and Pregnancy Accupuncture

There’s a lot to shake your head about these days.  First off, Caster Semenya, the South African track star accused of having both lady and man private parts, has been given the okay to run as a woman.  After almost a year of investigation by the International Association of Athletics Federation, where Semenya had to undergo numerous tests, she has been cleared to compete again in female running events.  The poor girl is only 19 years old and what if she was born a hermaphrodite?  Can that little bit of extra testosterone really make that much of a difference?  We’ve learned by now that most of those athletes take steroids and other performance enhancing drugs…what’s a little hair on your chest in comparison?  My take: as if being a teenager wasn’t hard enough – let the girl run as a girl and no more discussion on her private parts.

In other news and world reports, Lindsay Lohan is off to jail.  Yay!  Maybe she’ll get lost in the system and we’ll never hear from her again.  Maybe she’ll accidentally get shipped off to a prison in China where she’ll decide to stay upon release.  All I know is that I will be loving the break from Lindsanity that seems to grip our media.  If they spent as much time covering the oil leak that’s destroying the Gulf as they do that poor girl’s life, BP would’ve been shamed into fixing this national disaster by now.  Plus, I feel sad for her and in my humble opinion, a prison in China is exactly what she needs to get her life in order.  1 year in one of those low-security joints that put the inmates to work making toys, 5 more as a farmer in the Henan province in central China, and another getting assimilated back in the US in a small town somewhere.  It’s a plan that might just save her life.

And lastly, I went with my pregnant friend otherwise known as the Giant Panda, to go get acupuncture yesterday.  They stuck a bunch of needles in her to send signals to her body and to her baby that it was time.  The acupuncturist went “light” on the needles (-vs- “heavy” I guess when your due date has arrived and you want the baby out out out) and the Giant Panda is going back next week for session #2.  After that, her due date will be right around the corner and if baby hasn’t come, it will be time for “heavy.”  The Full Monty has an 88% success rate of starting up labor.  All I know is that I wish I had my camera.  If you haven’t seen a Giant Panda with little red needles sticking out of her in a million different places, you haven’t lived.  It’s great entertainment – almost as fun as watching grass grow.


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One response to “Private Parts, Lindsanity, and Pregnancy Accupuncture

  1. Mary

    take your camera next week and have them take the picture – you’ll want it for historical reasons!
    You know, bedtime stories and all. “Once upon a time, Sally (or Liz or Charlene or ?), I had to have needles put in me so I could get you out and stop looking like a Giant Panda”….or something along those lines..

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