Last night I celebrated St. Patrick’s Day with another couple and half of a third. Amid empty pints and dirty plates, the topic of a mancation came up. Mancation <man-kay-tion> a vacation with men only, usually one’s “guy friends.” Now don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of a mancation. I even enjoy the word mancation. What I don’t like however, is that we women don’t have any similar sayings. Womancation. Galcation. Chication. No, we just take regular vacations except that if we do it with just the girl we say we’re taking a vacation with just the girl. No special lingo in that.
And then I got to thinking about it some more. Human. Woman. Romantic. Commandments. Commando. Doorman. Mailman. Deliveryman. Policeman. Fireman. They’re all men! Germany is a whole country of men. Henchmen are men who break knees for other men. Almanac is a book just for men and mandates are rules that they have to follow. How about management? No wonder all the chairmen are men. Maneuver, what men like to do. Mange, what they get when they don’t clean themselves. Manicure, what no man should ever get caught doing. And Manipulate, how we ladies get them to do what we want.
The list goes on! Mansion. Manpower. Manufacture. All the maniacs, pyro, ego, nympho, what have you. Reprimand. Semantics. Wingman. I’ll stop before I bore you, but I think you get my point. And what special words do we women have? Feminism? Fembot? Galpal? These aren’t good words. These are like bones that society throws at us to make sure we don’t recognize that our entire vocabulary is set up to recognize men. Well no more. From now on I’m having Lady’s Lunches in my Ladymobile with my Ladymoney. I’m going to have Ladytails with a Lady salad and Lady fries. Afterward I might even go Lady dancing in a Lady’s club. And if any Policeladies, Mail-ladies or Comladydos (lady commandos) ask me what’s up, I’ll tell them I’m on a Ladycation. So there.