On Saturday I witnessed something that I just can’t get out of my head. What does it signify? Why did he say it? Maybe you can decipher it and tell me what the heck it all means.
I was at the gym minding my own business (read: people-watching) when I passed it…
He was a larger man in his forties with floppy, blond hair and glasses who reminded me of across between a yuppy, Ryan O’Neil and a ridden hard-put away wet, Phillip Seymour Hoffman. He had on a plain white t-shirt that tented over his beer gut stomach and mesh exercise shorts that hit just at the knee. He was chatting up a thirty-something woman who looked Russian maybe. She had short black hair with severe bangs and was wearing a red sports bra with low-slung, tight, red exercise pants that had flowers cut out on the sides of her thighs so you could see bare skin. Instead of sneakers, she had on big, black, furry, snow boots that laced up the front like super Uggs. Her body was on display to its finest although how she worked out in furry boots, I have no idea. To be honest, I have to report that in my opinion, she was one of those ‘great body, medium face’ kind of girls.
So there was Ryan O’Neil/Phillip Seymour Hoffman, standing if front of the towel rack chatting up Ivanka Ivanovich when I hear (and I’m quoting it because as soon as he said it, I emailed it to myself from my phone for perfect accuracy),
“I’m happily married and not very wealthy, but I just have to say, you are viciously hot.”
See? See! See?! What in the heck does this mean and better yet, who says things like this? I’m so intrigued, that I’ve decided to use this line myself and see what happens. Maybe I’ll get lucky. Maybe the candor about my financial solvency will be a big turn-on. Whatever. I’m still absolutely flummoxed.